How to find a husband - Bridgerton style!

Mercifully, it is no longer the eighteen-hundreds, so finding a partner to share our lives with is no longer the pressing life-or-destitution obligation it used to be back then. Today, most women (as well as men, and non-binary folks) don’t face the same pressures when looking for a partner, with love and companionship being a much bigger consideration for us than finances and propriety. However, a lot of us still dream of finding someone to share our lives with, so why not look to the romance of the season, Bridgerton, for some tips and tricks on how to find someone. These tips are framed around ‘finding a husband’ as it applies to a show like Bridgerton, so necessarily sound pretty focused on women in heterosexual relationships, but all of the tips below can apply to anyone looking for a partner regardless of gender or attraction. 

Chemistry is key 

Okay, so the first thing that your favourite Bridgerton couples have, whether Daphne and Simon, Anthony and Kate, or Penelope and Colin, is chemistry by the bucketload. I’m not just talking about physical chemistry (we are a family friendly blog, after all), but also strong personality compatibility. Think of the way that Anthony is drawn to Kate’s intelligence, or how Simon and Daphne are initially in cahoots. You have to find someone who is willing to laugh at the same jokes, gossip about the same people (but not in a vicious way!) and sign up for the same hairbrained scheme. I recently saw an interview with a woman who had lost her husband of four decades. When asked what the secret to a long marriage was, she said that she and her husband had ‘giggled together for forty years’ - so find someone you can giggle with! 

Be yourself

Though the ladies of Bridgerton face a lot of pressure to perform with decorum and class when making their society debut, it is the things that make them unique that keep their men coming back for more, plus a certain willingness to bend the rules. Kate charms Anthony with her determination, as well as her lack of interest in the marriage market - she is practically a spinster after all. Penelope - well, we all know how she bends the rules, but that’s a bit of a spoiler for the uninitiated. Don’t feel the need to dull your shine for anyone, it’s the things that make you you that the right person will fall for. 

Get glammed up - but keep it you 

This season of Bridgerton, we’ve seen Penelope Featherington shed the tight curls and garish gowns of her first two seasons, relaxing into more free-flowing fabrics and prettier hairdos. It is this ‘glow up’ into a more authentic version of herself, less bound by her family’s expectations of her, that has allowed her to finally become one of our romantic heroines. This is not to say that you have to slap on a load of make-up and splash a load of cash on new clothes, quite the opposite actually. Spending some time on finding out what look feels the most comfortable for you will allow you to feel more relaxed when meeting potential suitors. Also, who doesn’t love the excuse to get a little dressed up sometimes? We might not have balls, but a good date night outfit can help you go into something new feeling cute and confident. 

Get social

Nowadays, we don’t have as much of a formal marriage market, and balls remain mostly the purview of the ultra-monied (except from our reasonably priced balls during the Jane Austen Festival!), so we’re hardly rocking up to the dancefloor of a Friday night looking to fill up our dance card. However, as someone in my late-twenties, more and more of my friends are starting to turn away from things like dating apps, finding them stressful, laborious, and the prospects…wanting. We’re going to have to meet people the old fashioned way - by getting out of the house. Super popular at the moment is the running club, with many of my peers reporting that they might as well be speed-dating events, emphasis on the speed. For the less athletically inclined, there are so many different social opportunities on Meet Up too. Maybe you just need to get yourself out to the pubs and clubs a bit more. 

The social dance is also not entirely a thing of the past - different cities have salsa and bachata bars, line dancing nights, or even ceilidhs if you have a strong Scottish contingent where you live. These nights offer an opportunity to be brave and ask a cutie to dance with you. You never know, you might actually get to fill up your dance card after all. 

Have ‘main character’ energy 

The thing about Bridgerton is that you have to wait for your own ‘season’ to get coupled up. Every Bridgerton sibling will get their day - only Daphne, Anthony and Colin have had their go so far - and there are eight of them! Maybe the only reason you haven’t found someone yet is because it hasn’t been your season. Perhaps it is time to step into your ‘main character energy.’ This might, as above, mean giving yourself a bit of a makeover, or it might mean putting yourself out there, like joining a running club. Maybe it is as simple as accepting that you are as deserving of love as anyone else is. Easier said than done, I know, but in order to find the right person you have to be open to new possibilities as well as knowing how you want to be treated. 

What do you think? Is Bridgerton a terrible place to get dating advice, or are there things to be learned from it?